The art of fathering comes from experience and through modeling from the nurturing skills of mothers before us. When you and your partner work together from the moment of conception (i.e., attending childbirth classes together, interviewing care givers like doctors/midwives) till the baby is growing and needing both of your time, your mothering is easy and your marriage grows stronger. The father will also feel that joyful sacrifice that you feel. He will then understand why you behave in such way and how to be there at the right time for you and your baby. Fathers are also like expectant mothers, anxious of their new role as fathers. They are now serious in making more money for the new addition to the family. They view themselves as provider and giver of financial stability.
Frequently, because everyone is thinking As everyone thinks of the mother’s needs, the father is left on his own to fulfill his own emotional needs. He usually senses the need to be involved with own the birth of the baby and take part in the unfolding of this new life, but sometimes isn’t just just what he can and should do. He needs affirmation and praise for the work he does and the inovolvement he has.knows that he should also be patted on his back for he needs the reassurance that everything will work well. We should accept the many roles of our partner, the father of our babies, and learn to accept them where they are in their own parenting and fathering roles.
“I remember one father telling me how left out he felt of the breastfeeding experience, espeically in the baby’s first few months of life. As his child grew, he saw things he could do, and was a wonderful, nurturing father. It is a wonderful, joyous and challenging learning experience for all.” Pat Sonnenstuhl, CNM
The various roles a father takes in pregnancy,labor, birth and afterwards are: provider,birth assistant, massage therapist, health care giver at home, lover, nurturer, companion, friend and the list goes on and on.
Today’s fathers are more involved than ever in caring for their families and that the positive effect of their involvement touched all aspects of their lives. They were more likely to have successful careers, happy marriages, and to be leaders in the community. And their kids shared the success – sons and daughters of supportive fathers enjoyed more success in school and work.
An expectant father’s feelings should be validated in the same way we validate a mother’s feelings.After all, family-centered birth will drive the trend towards a more humane way of birthing, the real American way of birth.
To My Postpartum Wife
I am your partner, the father of our baby
I would like to care for our baby if not as much as you do
I wouldn’t like to see our baby given up to strange baby sitters
I wouldn’t like to see you cook, clean house, do the laundry or entertain
You will be given a helper, a doula, or an assistant
If not on our bed, you will be sitting on your rocking chair, wearing your nursing gown when resting
You shall honor me with my share of household chores
Take long walks in places with clean air, eat healthy food and drink much water and juice
Welcome with you friendly and helpful visitors with good baby advice.
Sleep when baby sleeps so that your nursing will go unimpeded.
I am your husband and I will give you the energy and environment conducive for both you and our baby.
Your partner in love, at your service
The above article is taken from my ebook , Birthing Ways Healing Ways. I have been a childbirth educator in the past. Now I am helping new parents with college and retirement plans. I provide information on tax free investing using index strategies with no market risks and funds that can be used during emergencies and health threats.
Connie Dello Buono
CA Life Lic 0G60621