Caring for parents by gen X

sandwich gen xnurses and caregivers

Most common issues with ailing parents, age 70 to 100 are: lack of appetite, lack of sleep, chronic conditions such as cough, pain, constipation, UTI, anxiety, depression, pneumonia, kidney and liver health issues from polypharmacy, med addiction, arthritis, inflammation and other degenerative health issues. It is very difficult when a spouse care for her ailing husband. She forgets to care for herself. It is also harder for Generation X, the sandwich generation to care for their parents and children at the same time and care for themselves at 50s who are experiencing more health issues.

Contact Motherhealth at or text at 408-854-1883 when you need a live in caregiver in the bay area for your home bound seniors.

In the US, health care costs are higher and meds are more expensive.

health over 65

There are many ways,tools, and support group that we can use to care for ourselves and our parents. Caregivers hourly or live in can provide respite when we need to rest from caring for our parents. Nutrition drinks such as Glucerna, Ensure or Boost can be used to provide nourishment to our seniors who do not have big appetite but needs to eat every 3 hours.

Medications have many side effects so review the timing of meds which can make our seniors pee more often at night which interrupt their sleep and so they nap more during the day when they need to get sunshine and walking exercise and daily routine of 3 meals, stimulation and snacks.

Our dietary supplements should be taken during the day as they are mostly stimulants to get us more sleep during the night. Calcium and magnesium and melatonin which help us sleep more should be taken late afternoon.

The goal of many in home caregivers is to allow our seniors to thrive and be active in the comfort of their homes. We use short-stay nursing homes for respite care, care homes for longer stay in company of 6 other senior clients with two caregivers. A hospice nurse or care attends to senior in care homes or in their own homes. Many times when we stop all meds because the senior is under hospice care, they live for more than 2 years instead 6months which their doctor told them so.  Many seniors in care homes who have taken so many meds every day and for many years, have easily bruised tissues because of the acidity of medications.

We can learn from each other in the way we care for our parents. Please email your stories to .

Remember to use your memory or lose it, use your muscles or lose it and experience life each day with less worries but with more learning and activity to nourish the soul and body. Children and grandparents should share their lives more with each other.

Older adults caring for their parents should seek caregiving support. In the bay area, 408-854-1883 is for caring caregivers 4hrs or live in.  Also call if you need referrals to care homes in the bay area since your seniors decided to downsize and sell their homes and stay in assisted living senior apartments or care homes instead.

Do visit our seniors in care homes, take them out every Sunday and give them massage for 20min or more.  Hospice means our parents do not or cannot eat anymore with diminishing health issues and the doctor or care home admin suggests for hospice care. Dying at home is the most preferred way for many surrounded by love ones.

hospice death

It is very challenging to live with others in a senior care facility. Private rooms are more expensive but 24 hr care is available with meals and many other caregiving services that would help families with other obligations at work, their own children and just visit their our parents in care homes or nursing homes.

sad stories in nursing homes

No matter where you want to spend your sick days, at home or care home or nursing home, plan your health early with support or network of providers and please do not over medicate.   Signs of cancer include: lose of sleep, lose of appetite and chronic health issues such as coughing and pain. Signs of Alzheimer and Dementia are lose of memory. Signs of stroke are inability to talk, move muscles in the body and face, eyes health issues and more. Do inspect your feet and eyes often as your feet and eyes tell more about your health issues than other parts of your body.

Positive impact of Google, internet, Youtube, Airbnb, UBER, Facebook, computers, smart phones, dietary supplements

An architect who lives in San Francisco was able to save $6000 per year using UBER.

Thousands of cities get more visitors who can live affordably using AIRBNB.

Many people learn new skills using the Internet, Youtube and Google.

Families are united after many years of absence because of finding each other in Facebook.

More healthy people are saved, cost of medications are cut and overall future health care costs are reduced with healthy lifestyle and use of dietary supplements and whole foods.

More tasks, jobs, learning, communication and networking occur using smart phones, and computers which created more jobs, more students and college grads with more skills and more happiness.

Can we find more ways to erase poverty and bring prosperity?

Yes, help me fund and develop a mobile app to match seniors and home helpers/caregivers. Contact Connie Dello Buono at 408-854-1883 or donate your time/real estate to Motherhealth Inc, 501c3 at 1708 hallmark lane San Jose, CA 95124

From California to Puerto Rico, Happy Father’s day


art of esther

I told my son (20-yr old in college) that I am leaving California to work in Puerto Rico so that he can finish college as I will try to help him financially. Watching him taking a lackadaisical approach in his studies made me think that I was not giving him enough challenges including learning to drive early on. I am leaving California and my two teens for Puerto Rico and for a dream contract job as travelling SPC consultant for a medical device company. As I boarded the plane, I saw some tears in my daughter’s eyes – my best friend and I also cried. She told me to save my money to be able to buy a small and affordable house in the bay area and that she refused to spend the money I sent each month but saved it instead.

To my surprise Puerto Rico and the Philippines (where I was born and raised) are similar in that they both: love Manny Pacquaio, lechon (pork), lumpia (egg roll), kiss to greet a friend each morn, dancing, leche flan (egg custard), plantain, warm beach, insects, greenery, yucca and yams, warm hospitality, Spanish language (only 25% of Tagalog has Spanish though) and more.

I came to memorize each name of the waiter, cook and receptionist at the Hilton where I stayed. It was my home for three months, spending time in the ocean to get rid of insect bites and strengthen my skin cells and body. I am glad that I brought the Eucalyptus oil that I bought at Whole foods and the coconut oil that helped me during the time that I had a cold and was sick or even just having skin rashes or insect bites.

I learned a new skill, InfinityQS SPC application, the use of a relational database application for automating manufacturing data.  One time, when I was stopped by a policewoman who spoke only in Spanish and I responded in English for over speeding, I was able to understand her as some of the Spanish words are also used in Tagalog.

After 3 months, I now missed California.  I missed spending quality time with my two teens who slept with me until they were 9 years old and were delivered at home by midwives. I missed dancing Zumba and ballroom in the bay area and in Filipino parties. I missed my friends, Whole Foods, the cold Santa Cruz beach, the farmer’s market and my loves.

Happy Father’s day to all fathers. I am reminded of my father, Nelson, who ensured that we were in bed at night with clean feet, put our priorities above his always, labored in difficult places and work to support his family of 6, told me to take care of my younger siblings when given more blessings in life and told me to find the treasure that I was looking for in the USA with courage, faith and love.